Seventeen is all about trying out independence. While 18 is when you are a legal adult, 17 seems to be very similar to learning to ride a bike with training wheels, the skills are all there but a bit of guidance is needed while confidence is built. Nate and I are attempting to "let go of the bike", we know Trent is ready, but we can't help but be afraid of him falling. It is hard to let go, but so exhilarating to watch him succeed as well. We are in the stage of answering Trent's questions with "what do you think?" or "it is up to you, we support your choice". We are trying to take away the list of rules to follow and simply are requiring respect for himself, his schooling, and his family when he makes his choices. Fewer rules sounded like the easier parenting road but it requires more patience on our end to let him think things through and the ability for us to keep quiet and let him play out his choices, without giving an overabundance of guidance. We are guiding Trent by being there for him, cheering on the sidelines, giving advice when really needed, and providing him a safe place to land while he tests out his skills. Trent is ready, he is smart, considerate, capable, and prepared for what this world may throw at him. I just have to take a deep breath, let go, and believe that even when he falls he is learning how to succeed in ways that I can't do for him.
